The journey to self love is a very mindful one. It happens when we are aware of ourselves & learn to love every part of ourselves passionately.
However it can happen that somewhere along our path we encounter people who love us for who we are & what we are, love us gently. That can be invigorating.
Unintentionally we get attached to that affection & attention & the softness of a warm relationship. In that softness we slowly slip into the “need” for that warmth & affection. We deeply desire that in our lives to keep us in an exhilarating space.
And then, somewhere in our solitary moments we feel daunted by that “need” of ours, the need for that unadulterated affection & daunted by the extension of our love for that someone who puts us in our happy space.
It’s inevitable that fear creeps in – fear of losing this space, this happy, comfortable zone. We begin to fear the brevity of it all, stirring up feelings of attachment, possessiveness, anxiety, toxicity, besides our feelings of affection & connection. We want to pull back before we lose ourselves to someone in a cauldron of unhealthy emotions-
For the truth is, we need to love ourselves first & reach the destination of self love before we drain ourselves of even that little bit of energy onto someone, anyone. We need to be comfortable within our selves in order to be comfortable in what another has to offer.
It’s only then that we are free of expectations, free of suffocating the other person, free of fear – fear of losing someone, of losing ourselves, of losing love. It’s only then that we understand that someone else’s love is just a bonus in our already fulfilled lives & that it doesn’t matter if that love disappears.
Yes, the truth is, only if we love ourselves implicitly can we make room for someone’s love.
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